Thursday, March 11, 2010

A chair symphony in four parts…Or…are you bored yet?



For those that asked for finished pics…

you know who you are

Yes I did it myself. Yes I am a total amateur. You can do this too. Promise.


I only needed one band-aid.

It all started with a thrift store find…that I sat In, walked away from, sat in again


and decided I would adopt .




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I didn’t like the upholstery and probably it didn’t like me either. If we are being completely honest.

Had no clue what I wanted…was thinking textural, non-color…perhaps a thick linen.

You all came up with GREAT ideas. Love ya for that!


Had no place to put it either.
But you know when these kinda things wiggle their way into your heart…it all works out. somehow.




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Big Butt in all her fur laden glory


I have upholstered some couches in the past…but never a chair like this

This didn’t have any way to cheatto just staple the fabric underneath like the couches did.

I knew I would just have to pull it apart starting with the double welting (the cord going along the bottom.


I never knew it was just glued on. REALLY glued on tight!


suck it up big butt…give me your dayum welting!




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With the welting off I began prying off the fabric…which is stapled on with at least

56,334,987 staples. I counted. I know.


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I wanted to take it off carefully so I could then use each piece as a pattern. by the time I got to the 56,000,000 th staple
I was ripping at it like a caged baboon.

*Tip: It helped to iron it after it was off.




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Serendipity allowed me to find this fabric for a mere 4 bucks a yard.


wild. yes. subdued and non color. no

But with your urging…again I love you’se guy


The marriage was planned. Big Butt was none the wiser.


Now normally one wouldn’t use such a large pattern on such a big butt…I’m sure Big butt would have demurely prefered a neutral linen

or black…to make her butt look smaller.

But she didn’t have a choice in the matter.




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With all the pieces off and velvet cut I realized I still didn’t have enough. So came up with a plan to make it look like it was the plan all along. Follow?


Fake it till ya make it mentality. I had some great thick cotton/linen-ish material left over from another unfunded mandate,er… project.


Perfect…in an imperfect kind of way. And free.

Away I went covering the bottom and stapling. Only my staples were thick and cumbersome. And I am pretty sure I called them even worse names.


Start at the bottom…do the inside then the outside arms…then the back.

baboon’s know this drill.




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The inside arms were tough little suckers




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There was webbing and stuffing and just stuff that wasn’t invited




to the friggin’ upholstery party. My inner baboon was rising to the surface again.




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I think that is where I stopped.




Until I kept tripping over it day in and day out.




**It helps to upholster in a major family walkway it makes the whole process more dramatic. And hard to forget that you quit.




::Cheat alert::

**Here is my biggest and best cheat trick. Go to your nearest friendly upholsterer and bring them a yard of fabric and ask them to make double welting for you.

double welting is your friend. Double welting is hard to make on a regular machine.


I guessed at four yards, and had 6 inches to spare. fake it till you make it.


Double welting at my local upholsterer cost 5 bucks.




do it.




Then I just glued the precious welt right over the tacks and staples with a hot glue gun.


yeah. Hot glue gun. Who knew

double welting lady knew.



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I used tacks at the top to hold the fabric better…

and decided to use decorative tacks on the linen pieces

to make up for allowing her butt to look big.




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they are called a french chain glamorous, no? and come in a strip where you nail in every fourth tack. Much easier than trying to nail each one


find them here



but in many places you will need to nail each one in.




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I had the pillow made from enhabiten before I even found the fabric. Cool,eh?


it’s filled with lavender and flax seed.

it’s heavy. It’s happy.




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Psssst...Anon Susan...That pic above is for you.






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Ole' fat ass is officially done.

kinda funky…but she’ll fit in this funky abode quite nicely.


DONE...give me a woofreakinhoo!

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